James’ 8th grade graduation was on Wednesday, June 11th. He looked so grown up and has a great group of friends. That night I had volunteered to MC his 8th grade formal dance in a hotel ballroom. The theme was space, and they convinced John and a friend (Tim Calton) to make a guest appearance dressed as Chewbacca and a storm trooper.
James was nervous that I would embarrass him, but I promised I wouldn’t and that I wouldn't do any Zumba moves. Emma came with me and helped with the mixer games. The DJ was a HS student and he was easy to work with. We brought all sorts of props. We did limbo, had huge beach balls, a hula hoop challenge, a game where they switch partners when we say “snowball," and the game where the girls put in one shoe and the guys have to find the owner and dance with her. It was long and we were exhausted when we got home.
The next day was the last day of school. John had planned to fly to SLC that afternoon to attend his brother Tim’s wedding on June 13th. The previous week my mom had not been doing very well. Every time I talked to one of my siblings it sounded like she only had a few days to live. John booked me a ticket on his same flight so I could visit mom. Within a day, all of my siblings made plans to be there that same weekend. What a wonderful time we all had together! We are so grateful for the Wilkinsons hosting us all. It was a tender mercy that my siblings and parents could have this time together (coming to UT from Ohio, Georgia, DC, Shanghai, and California).
John and I loved being at Tim and Brooke’s wedding in the SLC temple. My parents joined us for the luncheon at the Joseph Smith Memorial building. John stayed the rest of the day visiting with his family, while I went back to the Wilkinsons with my parents. That night I met John at Brooke’s parents’ home for the beautiful reception. The theme was nautical and it felt magical to me. This is Brooke’s second marriage. She has four young kids that already call Tim Dad. John flew back to Shanghai on Sunday morning. A young couple in our branch, Paul and Laurel Niedfeldt, stayed at our home to be with our kids while both John and I were in Utah.
John and his siblings
It was such a sweet and memorable five days for me! My mom is very weak and the cancer (serous carcinoma of the endometrium) is all around her abdominal and bowels. After four rounds of chemo they have decided to stop the treatment and just manage the pain. Two of the days I was there my mom had vitamin C infusions. This gave her enough energy to get out of bed, dress and attend Tim's luncheon and go to church with all of us. With her wig and makeup on it looked like she wasn't that sick, but most of the time she was in bed with cute little hats on. We sat around laughing, crying, telling stories, reading her "get well soon cards" and reminiscing. We took tons of notes and my brother did a lot of videoing.
With our mom's help we wrote her obituary, planned the program and music for the memorial service. I looked through the 18,000 pictures (no exaggeration) on her computer--picking 100 for a photo video montage that my brother will make. My mom wants to be cremated and have a memorial service in Cincinnati, OH. Tuesday my dad, Marcia, Karen and I attended the Draper temple. My dad seemed so very sad and lonely during the session. It was hard to say goodbye and fly back to Shanghai. After I left, my mom was given different medication that has taken away a lot of the pain. They have given her a comfortable hospital bed and a wheel chair. This medication gives her more energy and she is able to get out of the house daily. I honestly have the best mother ever -- so kind, patient and positive. There will be a huge void in this world and in my heart without her.
As of today, July 1st, my mom's hospice nurse has told us she has six weeks to live. This is such good news, and we hope to see her in July when we are in UT for Tessa’s baptism. The Lord is over all and has grand plans for my mom on the other side. How grateful I am for the knowledge that Families are Forever!
